I met with the parents of a 9 year old recently who shared with me that they were paying $550 a month for four, 60-minute monthly executive function coaching. These sessions consisted of the 9 year old meeting with a coach virtually who would prompt him to organize his school materials and then give him weekly homework in the form of a worksheet, which he never did. The parents were not asked to participate in the sessions. 🤔
Another family I met with hired a coach to work with their 13-year old son. These sessions consisted of the coach asking this boy abstract questions in an attempt to get him to be self-reflective and verbalize why he behaved certain ways. The boy would get frustrated because (like most kids with ADHD) he doesn't do well with abstract language or being asked questions that require him to tap into his episodic memory, as aspect of executive functioning that kids with ADHD struggle with. 🤔
📣Kids with ADHD cannot build executive function skills and independence on their own, parents need to create the "scaffolding" around them.
📣You cannot "outsource" helping your son/daughter at the expense of not doing anything at home, it will not work.
📣If parents do not learn how to change the way they use language, their child will remain prompt-dependent on them, they are also more likely to be pulled into the argument/negotiation/reasoning vortex. Their child may successfully use noise, learned helplessness and emotional manipulation to avoid non-preferred tasks. This is another way I see families lose time that could be used to help build skills.
📣Do not presume motivation in your son/daughter to improve their executive function skills, behavior or independence. It makes their life easier when you allow them to remain over-dependent on you & have lower expectations of them. They also do not realize that developing competency will build their self-confidence.
😱$550 a month for your child to meet with a Coach (an unlicensed and unregulated field) who prompts him/her to organize school materials, or play "armchair therapist".
👍$20 a month to spend a little time doing the work to improve ADHD-related challenges at their foundation through actionable strategies you can begin using immediately. You also get twice monthly "Office Hours" where your questions can be answered live. Next Office Hours are tomorrow.